Information you cannot live without

I've mentioned it before, but the Hemispheres magazine that United Airlines publishes is chock full of the kind of useful information (nonsense) that I just eat up. Naturally you are looking for an example and I just so happen to be able to provide one. This is from the January issue of Hemispheres:

German word of the month: "handschuhschneeballwerfer"

Good grief that is certainly a lot of letters strung together to mean...what exactly? This is how you would call someone a coward in the German tongue. Literally it translates to, "someone who wears gloves to throw snowballs." For kicks I put this into Google's translation function and voila it actually got pretty close.

I've also invented a new snowboarding trick because I'm really ready to elevate my skills to that next level. Due to this trick's landing position (on one's head), it is not recommended for...anyone.

It is quite obviously a tribute to the early pioneers of freestyle snowboarding such as [insert name of idiot with broken arm/leg/neck/face] with influences by other assorted Darwin award finalists.

Start your timers

I deactivated Facebook today so that I could disappear into the sunset. I'll still be around, but I like having a tighter control on what is posted about me/to me/from me than what Facebook provides.

Here's your proof:

We will see how long this lasts. My bet is: forever. Adios amigos/amigas.

Well this is not so good

Sigh. I purchased a really incredible new snowboard this fall in hopes that this would be the winter beyond all winters. So far we are barely able to cover the dirt in Vermont and not much hope in the forecast. The good news is that the rest of the country is suffering just as badly. What's up Snow Gods? Did I shred just a little too hard last year? (Note: I most certainly did NOT shred too hard) I suppose I'll just have to find a different winter activity to enjoy until it snows more. Playoff football only lasts another month? Eesh. Anyone have suggestions? Please do not suggest I go somewhere warm and sunny: those plans are already in motion. Details on that in the coming couple of weeks.

Fun Facts

January 5th marked the perihelion: the day that the Earth is closest to the Sun. How close is close you ask, because it wasn't particularly warm yesterday. Yesterday the Earth was approximately 91,402,500 miles from the Sun which is about 3.1 million miles closer than we will be at the aphelion in early July. These are big numbers, but what does 3.1 million miles really mean? Turns out it is only 16.7 seconds when you're traveling at the speed of light. No big deal, engage hyper drive and let's go!

And in completely unrelated news:

Farmers harvest approximately 1 BILLION coffee trees each year for Green Mountain Coffee Roasters.  Each tree produces 1 pound of coffee per year. Who is consuming a billion pounds of coffee? Turns out it is all of us. Second largest commodity in the world behind oil. Hawaii is the only state in the U.S. where coffee can be grown (I've had some and it is AMAZING) which means that we Americans are extermely dependent on foreign coffee growers. Likely more so than on oil considering the U.S. is able to produce 51% of the crude oil that is consumed domestically.

Imagine for a second if foreign suppliers turned off the flow of coffee and oil at the same time. Would you be willing to use half the oil you do now? That's not really that tough: plastic, gasoline, heating oil, etc. We would survive. What about living without ANY coffee? Whoaboy! Withdrawls, shakes, headaches, anger, violence. Riots in the streets! If the Iraq War was about oil, imagine what we would do to secure the coffee plantations of Brazil or Indonesia.

2011: A year in review

Cliche, everyone's doing it, blah blah blah, what did we all do this year, what is trending for next year etc etc. Deal with it, I'm doing it too, though here on 802Adventures you'll only receive OBJECTIVE FACTS. No wishy washy, just straight up numbers.

223 = Total working days in 2011
133 = Work days spent in the office
84 = Total number of days spent on company travel
69 = Total number of days spent on personal travel

This indicates that 40% of my working days were spent out of the office on company or personal travel. Not too shabby, but where did all this take me?

It took me to 15 states, 1 province, 1 territory, and 1 British overseas territory. Hopefully I don't leave anyone out!

In (sort of) chronological order:
Montreal, QC, Canada
Huntsville, AL
NYC, NY
Lexington, KY
Breckenridge, CO
Madison, WI
Monterrey Bay, CA
Los Angeles, CA
Tahoe City, CA
San Francisco, CA
Honolulu, HI
Lansing, NY
Camden, AR
Little Rock, AR
Boston, MA
Wilderness, ME
Mt. Washington, NH
Martha's Vineyard, MA
Portsmouth, NH
Block Island, RI
Phoenix/Scottsdale, AZ
Yuma, AZ
Grand Canyon, AZ
Miami, FL
Key West, FL
Sanibel Island, FL
San Juan, PR
Many points in the British Virgin Islands

I will go ahead and predict that 2012 will have some entertaining travel as well. South Korea in spring? Paris in the fall? Family christmas in Belize!?! (Long shot, but always helps to get the ball rolling early)

Enough of this jabbering, I have a suitcase to pack, but, before I go, one last thought: Burlington VT is an amazing place for coming home. The beauty of the place I now call Home and the friendliness of the people in this place are incredibly welcoming for a weary traveler.

Thanks Mom!

Nothing like some homemade ginger snaps with applesauce this holiday season. A little extra ginger and a little less time in the oven make all the difference in the world.

What to do, What to do...

Thanks to my good friend Jonathan, I've started to think about a change of careers. Still in aerospace, but less aero and more SPACE.

Check out this job posting from USAJOBS

I meet all of the requirements:
- Four year degreee in Mechanical Engineering
- Height/Weight to fit into the space suit
- Mentally stable for long periods of isolation (mostly thanks to sitting on a tractor for much of my youth)
- Several years experience in the defense industry, including working with rockets
- Drug free
- Able to pass the swim test
- Low blood pressure
- Calm under pressure
- 1000 hours of flight time in jets. Hmm, this could be a stretch, so let's check the math:

Required hours (1000) / Average flight time (2 hours) = 500 flight segments
Flight segments (500) / Average segments per round trip (4) = 125 round trips

That works out to about 12 years of flying at my average (10 round trips) rate. I'd same I'm a little short in that category, but heck, maybe an exception could be made. Oh, they want me to actually FLY the plane? Don't jets today mostly fly themselves? Well....huh. Guess I better get a license. And a jet. And jet fuel money.

Now accepting donations!

Coins!

I probably should go to Coinstar more often when you get results like this. How will I spend my new found wealth? Stay tuned!!

You know the End of the World is near...

...when you're flipping through the channels and find that CSPAN2 is broadcasting live updates of congress.

Not real congress, but their twitter updates. The twitter updates of our esteemed lawmakers. Sigh...

I refuse to hash tag, sorry twitter fans.

Who knew?

According to leading experts in the field, this creature represents, and I quote, "all that is evil in this world."

Please take a moment to inspect the nefarious (vocab word of the day!) critter and be prepared to counter any evil deeds. Suggested acts of good include, but are not limited to:
1. Supporting this blog by donating to the author.
2. Really that's it. Thanks for your help!